monologue w shreeya

Representing the female community of this twenty first century, i feel humble and grateful for the opportunities that i could fetch. As going a little back and narrating the story of my Maa back to 40s or 50s the lifestyle and responsibility of women were so different. Back then there was sexism and patriarchy of course in the peak and literacy of women were just about to be written in the laws. My Maa, she carried like seven children and her responsibility or life was limited in the care of family and other thoughts or dreams wouldn't even grow. Even knowledge of periods and hygiene of women were never the talk of the town. It was the beginning of revolution where rights of women were just getting attention. Coming back to the generation of my mommy, well she got education with this her thinking and involvement in matters of living is as equal to my baba. Baba, he said that the day after they got married, he sent mom to tuition as she was in the verge of completing her master'...

 Hello there, To the person who’s far from the limelight You deserve to be called beautiful who is unseeingly very bright and kind and merciful The way you want to hug the left out one and often inspire with your humble words At the end of the day when all are gone You get alone and seek for those same words You put a gentle smile To spread contentment to the world Even if you’re burdened with a pile But still you choose present and in it be swirled I am proud of you for what you are And hope you reach where you want to be You deserve to romanticize your life Not only in thoughts but in actual reality.

World’s full of enthusiastic beings and amidst it I feel like getting lost Stumbling around little things my mismanaged emotions burst I will not blame anyone for it Instead my overreacting hormone which is sensible against little of stimuli and my brain conveys a note unknown I hear a distorted sound like in an old television somewhere deep within me Which leads a reality and dream collision from where I quicker want to flee I would like to clarify you my dear reader that I am not high at all presently But sometimes gloomy time will make life a little scattered as nothing in this universe goes perfectly -Shreeya Shrestha

Waking up with hatred towards oneself, -i was never this human, living with the past bitter experience and forgetting to cherish the beautiful ones -i would never do this to me, shedding down tears for the fleck of mess -i was never taught to be this weak, mental exhaustion, anxieties -i would never know its meaning and never would i ever accompany them, mind cluttered with heavy noises, can't dos, unusual thoughts -i would never let myself swell in learning more, melancholy mask facing the world and this feeling of having a void within -i would better skip this adulting process and always be a child; contended and sufficient. A minor now being a legal adult and having this whole of transformation in every dimension of life- this is something for a 'change' trying to fulfil the necessity of it i write.  The art of forgiving and healing. Time is inevitable and so is death both of them have no mercy towards you. One will take all the form of memories and the other will take t...

 I want to let you know that you are an amazing human. As a pov from that lil shy 8-year-old, you should know that she is happy with you, no matter where in life you are and proud of you. There will be challenges, failures, hardships, mental breakdowns and so much of it coming but i know you will gracefully conquer this path. I believe in you as you were always this very hardworking, determined curious, happy human also a lil underrated as you really showed less of your flaws, goofiness, ideas, creativity lacking confidence. But its okay no regrets in life. I forgive myself and I move on ahead to learn more of life and always aiming to be sufficient at the end of the day. I am grateful for every little things, people, emotions, this life and entirety of universe. I have my goals and targets written but to check them out i really hope to limit myself in the system on it and not just dreaming about it. I don't think i am really born to be a dreamer but actually a realist, an experime...

When i shut my phone down and grab a book, try reading, a half an hour passes then i come to know i am just reading not learning. So, I throw myself away from that particular study space and now i am with my thoughts. My thoughts, my enemy. The number of times that I've been misguided with, where am entertained with short term pleasure and slammed myself with regrets only, false hope, and a lot more. I do have this urge of picking up my phone and get absorbed by the exterior world and just forget everything with this sweetest of fed dopamine. But then i do have this courage to gather guts to not to and just lay off with my own deepest thoughts. I don't know why i hate you but have no option rather than staying with you. Just being indecisive, low confidence and venting in from everything outside, being sensitive and antisocial being is what my thoughts crafted me to be and i couldn't ask less for being the ultimate pessimistic living. You've given me open threats and ma...

Well, this has been a matter of discussion for quite sometimes now.   But the fact that it has been only a matter of discussion and there have not been any implementations of conclusions for it. So till when is this going to continue? Who are the bodies responsible? When will it change? So, as being a high school graduate and having a prior experience of 12 years as a student excluding preschool education cause I barely do remember, and my brain cells were not developed enough to be judgmental then. I write some bodies who I feel like are a part of it but they pretend not to be. Teachers: I have had observed “n” no. of teachers and amongst them there are a few who I remember to be an ideal one. A few means one or two that’s it. Why teachers? Because as far as, I know every students try to be appealing in front of their teachers (appealing in a sense smart and good enough) as teachers' evaluations does matter and if one remains good and nice, they get good grades out of it and v...