new girl in the city

narayani ko tir tira

As a premed student, never have I thought that I would move out of the nyano comfort of ktm valley and settle apart by own. Leaving mommy, baba and dai and just visualising the home without me ached my heart.

I will not deny the fact that I am this pampered valley girl who was exposed to less of the outrage of being on own and facing the world. Me a more shy creature, the survival instincts were really doubtful on being apart lol. Yet, the placement to a new place, Chitwan was less of choice and more of base mark from where I could unlearn things and most importantly grow out from the shelter of comforts.

Chitwan, known as the medical hub of the country. My first insight to you was more farakilo roads and more of greens, pollution comparatively less. I saw hamro CMC and line of hospitals and medical centers and was convinced my future profession placement is somewhere in the right place. (the only way i could convince myself on accepting moving apart). First day on admission, it was more emotional ride on How will I survive here for like five six years. It was just tough and the journey was overwhelming with whirlpool of thoughts. Amidst all, the temperature difference and adapting to it was also concerning. Multiple questions, multiple opinions all trying to settle in a very new place, felt really lonely.

The last day in ktm when i packed all my bags and saw the empty cupboards without my belongings, the heaviness felt in heart can really not be expressed in words. The initial ride to chitwan with mommy, baba and my stuffs, shreeya your life was really going to change from then. I viewed world with a lens that I never had before, that was being on own. The bidden goodbyes to baba, mommy with tears ani my baba being a big emo it just made so difficult, the pain of being distant from the people you love is so aching, even while writing this my eyes get wet.

Cut to the emotional aspect, miss little shreeya happens to be very first of all arrivals and of course medical college, ragging, I was so scared. But out of all the miseries in life, god tend to be so kind to me (touch wood), I just made like a really good bond with my immediate senior next door Roshni didi and she just stood for me through all odds. I felt the very first feeling of home when i perhaps needed itso much. Making friends, was also a tough task for the introverted side of me but just happened to get adopted by a good close knit kind hearts. Sonu, the way you fill my silence with your social battery and just be the most helpful being gave me a touch of motherhood. Ostika, i couldn't ask for a better roommate than you, as there is a line of mutual respect to each other and no chaos, just peace and how calm you have been. Salina, my dearest baini, thank you for not judging me and my rants and giving me your presence when i was full of advice. Aishwarya, the sassy human, you bring spice to our life and it just adds up a flavor that we need at the end of the day. Swornima, you have been a personality I reach out to be, the strength you own is so appreciable. Ojaswee, dear you know your arrival has added so much fun to our lives, and thankyou for making me feel pretty. These are the hearts that I have made a lil home in. The peak girlhood, where all hardships were surpassed and remained close knit for almost more than a year through all. Thankyousomuch for being there, through words nai, i love you all and wish the best of each of you all.

Chitwan and your sunset, i am in an absolute awe inn. How good they are, yes in a corner of the terrace i will be beside my biochem ko cycles and patho ko microscopy but just the scenic view and the serotonin release is itt. My nature loving side just awakened and little things like trees fluttering and birds chirping remain noticed. Okay, I ani mero sathi haru take charge on stealing mangoes and litchi early morning, cause its mother nature. The people of chitwan around, mesh ko didi haru and their little smile pass or a random auto wala dai who take less fees, these little gesture reflects the kindness from within.

Studies and exam pressures for any MBBS students has been like a wave of ECG deflecting happiness positively and negatively. Beside hectic schedule of weekdays, escape to shantichowk or any planned place, dressing nicely during weekends fills so many memories in the diary. The post exam relief, any medicos that is like an oxygen supply to the hypoxic soul (feeling the feeling rn).

A lil harsh word for you chitwan, no matter how much I try to sway with you, somewhere I will never belong to you and you will never belong to me. There is an unfilled void here and only the city noise of the valley will fill it. You are my study/workplace, that I have an immense respect for you and the learnings from here is the beginning of something great, yet I dont think I will ever return until its done and dusted. Life isnt so predictable, tables may turn but unless i have the power to flip it, i choose to remain somewhere i was birthed in and my heart will always belong to kathmandu sahar no matter where in the globe i am. Chitwan, you hold a bitterly sweet memories, where i dont want to revisit anymore but still taking no regrets cause it might be all fine one day. Have more few years with new story tales about to be written. Until then, more of sunsets, narayani ko tir, chitwan ko garmi and just the feeling of being on own.

lastly, Deprived of this space of longing here, i claim myself as a stranger in this new city. so here is it,"the new girl in the city."

Thank you if you reached here, have a good day my reader